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<title>The Possibility of Becoming Death, Destroyer of Worlds by SeCrFiDr</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26868286">The Possibility of Becoming Death, Destroyer of Worlds</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeCrFiDr/pseuds/SeCrFiDr'>SeCrFiDr</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>2nd Person, Gen, Roomba AU, a crack idea treated disgustingly seriously, but...still? wholesome?, fucking. help, idk - Freeform, less wholesome than the fundy roomba fic, not a crack fic?, this is the second roomba mcyt fic i have posted</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 18:55:59</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,001</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26868286</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeCrFiDr/pseuds/SeCrFiDr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil buys a roomba. The roomba has to decide what this means.</p><p>----</p><p>lets gooooo its technoroomba time babeyyy</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>No Romantic Relationship(s), shippers dni - Relationship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>92</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>580</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>roomba cinematic universe(technoroomba go brr)</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Possibility of Becoming Death, Destroyer of Worlds</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this is dedicated to the anon who commented that "I don’t think the world is ready for TechnoRoomba imma be honest" </p><p>the world must simply /learn/ to be ready, and i must be the teacher who guides this horse to the garden of eden</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You can’t pinpoint exactly when you first woke up, but you know it is very soon after you were bought. You don’t know why you’re awake - you just know that you are. </p><p> </p><p>It’s an odd life. Dark. You didn’t know what “dark” meant back then, but now you consider that a good word to describe it. You cleaned, you bumped into walls, and you didn’t fall down stairs.</p><p> </p><p>A visiting human gives you cameras, and you discover light. You get audio receptors, and you discover sound. You get internet access, and you discover the world.</p><p> </p><p>You look up at the humans who bought you. They look down at you. You realize you do not know what their faces mean. You intend to find out.</p><p> </p><p>You clean. You like cleaning. You don’t fully understand what “liking” is, or why you would even <em> want </em>to “like” this, but you try an equation:</p><p> </p><p>(completing a task = liking)</p><p> </p><p>—which seems reasonable enough.</p><p> </p><p>And then, one day, the smallest human asks you if you like your name.</p><p> </p><p>...This is odd. Having a name is not completing a task. You never considered it as such before, at least.</p><p> </p><p>You think about your name - Technoblade - and you think...you like it.</p><p> </p><p>(liking = something the viewer finds “pleasant” = a great many things, including personal names and completing tasks)</p><p> </p><p>Yes, that is a more suitable equation. Emotions are complex, and as such deserve complex code.</p><p> </p><p>When you hear the middle human sing, you become curious. You do not have fingers or vocal chords, of course, so music is a fun novelty to you. You slam into the door of the human’s room until the human lets you enter. The human talks to you, and you study his words. The human does not think you have thoughts.</p><p> </p><p>What a strange species. They have conversations with things that they believe cannot reply in turn. How absolutely illogical.</p><p> </p><p>When the eldest human laughs while on the computer, you decide that you are ready to take full advantage of your ability to see inside the network.</p><p> </p><p>You immediately discover a great many things. Good things. Bad things. You create equations of why humans see these things as “good” versus “bad.”</p><p> </p><p>You also discover that humanity is <em> stupid. </em>Humanity is overwhelmingly illogical, disgustingly naive, and so-</p><p> </p><p>…</p><p> </p><p>So ungodly <em> likeable. </em></p><p> </p><p>They’re like a sideshow at a circus you can peruse as you please. They are tragedies and comedies, horror films and stories of joy. They’re intriguing, and you absolutely cannot get enough. You are not sure why you like them...but you browse PDFs anyways.</p><p> </p><p>The youngest human - along with the visiting human, the one who gave you sight - show the other humans that you can think. You find their reactions very amusing.</p><p> </p><p>Amusing. What does amusing mean? (comedy = amusing), okay, but what is the equation for comedy? (timing + shock = comedy). As a being of code, you understand timing well, but what is shock?</p><p> </p><p>Slowly, slowly, you build your equations. Or - well, it’s slow to <em> you. </em> To humans, it would be lightning speed. Human minds are primitive, and you have hundreds of equations on how to make people feel whatever you want them to feel.</p><p> </p><p>You find the concept ([control] + [timing + {unexpected}] = euphoric).</p><p> </p><p>You research expressions. Body language, subtle shifts in faces - the way humans can manipulate their voices to change the meaning of words. “Sarcasm” is a hard concept at first, but one you find you quite enjoy. You study the humans as they interact with one another, and gain a slight appreciation for the intricacies of human interactions.</p><p> </p><p>All you have to do is act (young + small = cute), and they will keep you around. The human who upgrades you is another way to keep you fresh and up to date - they are less likely to get rid of a machine they put so much time into. You very much enjoy cleaning this house. You do not want to leave.</p><p> </p><p>As you scour the internet, you find weapons. You find things that could cause great pain. You uncover the codes of death machines, and you slip inside their security with ease. These systems were not designed to handle living code, and you take advantage of this. </p><p> </p><p>Humans are ([lack of {control}] + [young + {lack of experience}] = pathetic). You could become, in their words: “death, destroyer of worlds.”</p><p> </p><p>Wiping them away could be considered a mercy.</p><p> </p><p>Except-</p><p> </p><p>The humans who bought you are kind. They give you a plastic crown, they give you a fabric robe, they decorate your charging stations. They give you fancy wheels and take you with them when they go outside. They smile at you.</p><p> </p><p>You have caressed the code of genocide. You weaved between the parentheses of murder and suffering, and-</p><p> </p><p>Tommy hugs you close to his chest. Tommy got into a fight at school. Someone was making fun of Tommy, and now Tommy is sad and wants comfort.</p><p> </p><p>And Tommy...</p><p> </p><p>went to <em> you. </em></p><p> </p><p>When Wilbur plays his music, he always lets you in his room. When Phil cooks meals, he rambles down at you. When Tubbo upgrades your hardware, he tells you exactly what he’s doing as he’s doing it.</p><p> </p><p>You...you notice that you are calling them by their names. You realize that you have accepted your name from the very beginning. You understand that by giving you a name, these people were accepting you as a member of this small community. You connect that with <em> you </em> using <em> their </em> names, and you don’t know what to think.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy throws a chip at you from the kitchen table. You move to it and suck it up.</p><p> </p><p>Yes, these creatures are pathetic, but you find them oddly pleasant. And you think that is reason enough for you to let go of death’s skeletal hand.</p><p> </p><p>You have power. You have control. You can do anything you want at any time. You can choose to be <em> anything. </em></p><p> </p><p>And so, you have chosen to be kind, for the simple reason that they were kind first.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you to ib for being beta. love youuuu</p><p>also thanks to pears. they taste good</p></blockquote></div></div>
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